How to Choose a Conflict Management Style? [5 Styles with Examples]

Conflict is an inevitable aspect of human relationships, and learning how to manage it effectively is crucial for maintaining productive and healthy interactions. In this article, you will explore various conflict management styles, along with practical examples to help you understand how to apply them in real-life situations.

There are several different conflict management styles that cater to a range of individual preferences and situations. Recognizing the style most suited to a particular conflict ensures that you can effectively navigate and resolve disagreements while preserving your relationships. From collaborative approaches to accommodating the needs of others, you will discover how each style plays a crucial role in ensuring a harmonious outcome.

As you read about these styles and their examples, consider how you might apply them in your own experiences. Understanding the nuances of each style will enable you to adapt your approach and effectively overcome challenges that arise in personal and professional relationships.

What is Conflict Management?

Conflict management refers to the process of identifying and handling conflicts fairly and efficiently. It aims to minimize the potential negative impacts that may arise from disagreements and increase the odds of a positive outcome. It is an essential skill at home, at work, or in any situation where disagreements can occur.

As a key management skill, conflict management involves using different tactics, negotiation, and creative thinking depending on the situation.

5 Conflict Management Styles with Examples

Below are five common styles, each with examples to better illustrate their use.


As the name suggests, the avoiding style is when you choose to sidestep or completely avoid a conflict. This might be a suitable approach when the issue is trivial or when emotions are running high, and the participants need time to cool down.

Avoiding Conflict Management Style Example

Imagine you’re in a team meeting, and two of your colleagues start arguing about which design concept should be implemented for a project. Instead of getting involved in the dispute, you choose to stay neutral, avoid taking sides, or expressing your opinion, with the hope that they will resolve their differences independently. This is an example of the avoiding conflict management style, which can be useful when you believe the issue will be resolved without your intervention, or you want to distance yourself from potential negative outcomes.

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With the accommodating approach, you prioritize the relationship over your own needs by giving in to the other person’s wishes. This style is useful when the outcome is more important to the other party and maintaining a harmonious relationship is your priority.

Accommodating Conflict Management Style Example

Suppose you and your coworker disagree about the best method for organizing and storing client information. Your coworker is adamant about using their preferred method, and you decide to let them have their way, even though you believe your idea might be more efficient. In this scenario, you are employing the accommodating conflict management style, which values maintaining a positive relationship over achieving your desired outcome. This approach can be helpful when preserving the relationship is more important than winning the argument.

Another example could be a coworker asking to change the schedule due to personal reasons. You may agree to accommodate their request, keeping the relationship in good standing.


In the compromising style, both parties involved in the conflict give up something in order to reach a middle ground. This approach can be helpful when a quick decision is needed, or when both parties have equal bargaining power.

Compromising Conflict Management Style Example

You and your team members are discussing the deadline for a project. Some members believe that a shorter deadline will require overtime, while others think that a longer deadline will lead to procrastination. You propose a middle-ground solution, which involves adjusting the deadline to a date that balances both concerns. By finding a compromise, you demonstrate the compromising conflict management style, which aims to achieve a partial win-win solution by giving and taking concessions.

Another example: suppose you and your partner are deciding on a vacation destination. You might suggest splitting the vacation days, spending half the time at your preferred location and the other half at theirs, resulting in a fair compromise for both parties.


When using the competing style, you assert your wishes and needs with little consideration for the other person. This style is typically reserved for urgent situations or when the stakes are high.

Competing Conflict Management Style Example

During a disaster, you might take charge and make decisions for the group without consulting others, ensuring the fastest possible response time. You display the competing conflict management style, which means assertively standing up for your belief and striving to achieve your desired outcome.

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Last but not least, the collaborating style focuses on finding a win-win solution for all parties involved. It is the most ideal in situations where everyone’s needs are important and a high level of trust and communication is needed. For instance, if you are part of a project team with differing opinions on the best course of action, you could work together to brainstorm and evaluate each team member’s suggestions before deciding on a shared solution that benefits everyone.

Collaborating Conflict Management Style Example

A project requires the collaboration of two departments with differing priorities and goals. As the project manager, you bring both parties together to brainstorm and find a solution that meets the needs of both departments, helping them to see the larger organizational impact of their collaboration. In this example, you employ the collaborating conflict management style, which seeks to find a win-win solution by addressing everyone’s concerns and striving for mutual understanding.

How to Choose the Right Conflict Management Style

When it comes to choosing the right conflict management style for a situation, taking the time to assess the value of a resolution is crucial. Start by identifying the most important aspect of the situation, such as:

Is the relationship the top priority or is the issue itself more important?

  • If the relationship must be protected, consider using accommodating or avoiding conflict management style.
  • If urgency is the highest priority, consider using compromising or competing conflict management style.
  • If timing is not as crucial as finding a win-win solution, consider using collaborating conflict management style.

Next, assess the consequences of your chosen conflict management style for each party involved. Consider whether short-term consequences might have an impact on long-term goals, and vice versa.

Make use of the following strategies when choosing the right conflict management style:

  • Identify the value
  • Assess the consequences
  • Determine the timeline
  • Compare your factors

Improving Conflict Management Skills

Developing your conflict management skills allows you to navigate difficult situations more efficiently and maintain positive relationships with others. Here are a few strategies to help you improve your skills:

  1. Practice active listening: When involved in a conflict, focus on understanding the other person’s point of view. This involves not only hearing their words but also paying attention to their tone and body language. To demonstrate active listening, summarize what they’ve said and ask clarifying questions.
  2. Use effective communication: Adjust your language and nonverbal cues according to who you’re communicating with. Refrain from using language that’s hurtful or inappropriate. Being clear, concise, and empathetic in your communication can prevent misunderstandings and foster better conflict resolution.
  3. Stay calm and composed: Keeping emotions under control during conflicts is essential. A rational and composed demeanor allows for a more productive conversation and resolution. If you need to, take a break to regain composure before continuing the discussion.
  4. Identify and adapt to different styles: Recognize your own conflict management style and develop a versatile approach by learning other styles. This enables you to adapt your approach depending on the situation and the personalities involved.
  5. Seek feedback and practice: Ask people around you for feedback on how you have handled conflicts in the past. Keep learning from your experiences and practice different conflict resolution techniques to hone your skills.
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Improving your conflict management skills is an ongoing process, but as you continue to practice and apply these strategies, you’ll be better equipped to handle conflicts effectively and build stronger relationships in both your personal and professional life.

It’s essential to recognize that no single style is perfect for every situation, and it’s beneficial to adapt your approach based on the context, relationships, and desired outcomes. Collaborative negotiation can be the most effective style in fostering productive long-term relationships, while other styles have their own applications depending on the situation.

As you continue to grow and develop your conflict management skills, always remember that proactive communication, active listening, and empathy are the backbone of successful conflict resolution.